Robby is off in Las Vegas. My 21 yr old son, who loves gambling and received well over a thousand bucks for his Birthday, took himself and his debit card with him to Las Vegas. And yes, that makes me nauseous. This kid, who is no longer a kid, received as a right of passage the largest money gifts he will ever receive from here on out. And where is he? Vegas. Prayers have been said, and that’s all I can do.

Now I’m about to contradict absolutely everything I wrote in my letter to him. Well not completely.  No one ever told me that the worry doesn’t end,even when they reach adult status. They are, and always will be your babies you’ll worry about. Mainly, the letter I wrote him, was letting him know, that painful lessons will be his to live thru now. I won’t be bailing him out of anything from here on out. Bad choices he makes, will be choices he lives with, I will not even attempt to pick up any pieces. I know that probably sounds harsh, but it is the way it must be.

Being an adult is a double edged sword. Giving him the respect that he feels he is due, and that rightfully I should give him, is one thing. But the other edge of the sword is I don’t bail out other adults I know, and will not bail him out either. This is where my mothers angst enters stage left. I can’t pick up any pieces in his life, for his own good. But emotionally, it will kill me if he puts himself into situations that he needs bailed out of. I think mainly what I’m referring to is his finances.

I look at his life, and all the playtime he has. And the million and one things he does now, that I didn’t do until age 30 or above. He just got back from his first Cruise. He is off to Vegas this week-end. 4th of July it is off to Coronado Island (outside of San Diego) He goes, he does, he eats out, he plays. I am glad he is able to do all this. But these are the very reasons I won’t ever bail him out. I really have no clue as to how balanced he is financially. And I may very well be worrying unnecessarily. Learning how to budget is a part of growing up. And he very much is on his own now.

I don’t think the moment really sunk in for him. These gifts, that he received were given as a possible start for savings, or to save for a house...something outside of his budget.I pray he realizes that the money boat has left the dock for good. His biggest gift was given to him by his dads mom. She was overly generous, and followed her gift up the same way all of us did. This is it Robby. I didn’t see it sink in, I pray it did. But still I worry. And bite my tongue.