As I’ve aged, I notice each year seems to go by faster than the previous one. Seriously, this is mildly upsetting to me. I’ll be 43 soon, and I’m not happy about it. Where did the last decade go?

I’ve aged a decade in the last two years. Looking at photos from the beginning of my relationship with my husband, and then photos over the last two years, the number and depth of the wrinkles setting in is alarming.

My oldest and his fiance have broken off their engagement. On some levels this makes me sad. On others? Well, I have secretly felt they were too young to get married.

My oldest is hurting over the broken engagement, which upsets me and brings out the Mommy in me. I find myself more than a little resentful at his X-fiance.

On the other hand, it has me counting all of her faults and weaknesses, which makes me thankful this wedding never happened.

I wish I could take the pain away from my son, and make it feel better. I know I can’t, which is frustrating!

Someone close to me is going through marital problems that are severe. It shakes my emotions to the core, to think of this couple divorcing.

Riley (my 11 yr old son) continues to improve on his school work and behavior this year. Fingers and toes crossed he continues in this direction. I do believe his new teacher, and her positive attitude has a good deal to do with this.

Tayler (my 12 yr old daughter) seems to be thriving in Jr High School. This brings smiles to my face and heart. She has quit playing “get into character” (for her desired, future acting career) at school. She does start another drama class this Saturday, as well as a basketball team this week.

Getting into routine this year has proven a little trickier than in past years, although I’m not sure why. Possibly it’s due to driving to two different schools every morning and afternoon, at two different times. And being concerned for both kids. Riley is in 5th grade and this is a tough year of learning. Starting out behind from last year can make it tougher. Tayler starting Jr. High School had me worried, since my thinking is that Jr. High kids are the most sadistic, mean little shits, ricocheting with an overload of hormones to boot! It seems my worrying was wasted energy, at least at the moment, with both kids doing well.

Now that I have the routine down, the husband and I are taking off for a week starting September 18th. Back to “our playground” in Laughlin, Nevada. This trip, we have a room at the Colorado Belle WITH a balcony facing the river. Nothing relaxes me more, than being able to sit on a balcony and gaze at a body of water. People watching is fun too.

Yes, I started blogging again, just in time to take off for another week.

I am keeping mindful of the amount of time I sit at the computer blogging. My neck and back have improved tremendously since I quit sitting at the computer for 5 hours a day. Which means I may make it around to all my reads, not quite as often as in the past. I still love you though.

BALANCE is the name of the game. Something that I lose when my obsessive/compulsive tendencies kick in. When I find something I enjoy, like blogging, I lose my perspective and spend too much time doing it. So keeping a constant eye on balance takes conscious effort on my part.
BALANCE = GOOD
OBSESSING = BAD

Although I obsess, I’m also easily distracted. I am smack in the middle of reading three books. My goal is to finish at least one of them this week. (Yes I know I have an easy life, and refuse to feel guilty because of it. OK, I’m trying not to feel guilty.)

My three books that I’m reading right now are:

Reviving Ophelia by Mary Pipher, PH.D.  A book I highly recommend for mothers raising a pre-teen or teenage daughter. It’s basically an easy read, and deals with the many problems young girls face today. Presented through therapy sessions with the girls themselves, this insightful book is a wonderful aid in trying to raise young women with strength, confidence and a healthy sense of self. More than a little challenging, during a time when our culture is saturated through the media, with unrealistic ideals of beauty, images of dehumanized sex, and a myriad of addictions and sexually transmitted diseases. As depressing as this sounds, Dr. Pipher gives practical guidance in dealing with the pitfalls of raising healthy daughters. A must-read for parents of young girls. (OK, I’m thinking I want to finish this one first.)

Straight Up and Dirty by Stephanie Klein I’m loving it, much like I enjoy watching episodes of Sex and the City. Shephanie’s writing style makes this easy to immerse myself into her life. I find myself relating to her, as far as some of her feelings and insecurities about herself and relationships. With the backdrop of NYC that adds a sense of glamour, this book is a pleasurable read.

And a book I started recently, that drew me in immediately, is Swapping Lives by Jane Green. I picked up this book because I had read one of her previous books that I remember enjoying years ago. As I’m not that far into this one, I can’t give an accurate description yet. According to the cover, it deals with the effects of a husband’s repeated infidelity.

Besides these three, I have over a dozen more to read, before I’ll allow myself to buy another one.

I have not been successful in my goal to quit smoking. Although I’m not giving up on quitting. I WILL succeed, eventually. Although I have pushed back my next “quit date” until after we get back from Laughlin. People smoke WAY TOO MUCH in that town, so trying to not smoke there isn’t going to work. I need at least a month of not smoking under my belt before going back to Laughlin.

OK, I think I’ve pretty much emptied out the rambling thoughts, for now anyway. I hope all of you have a productive and stress-free Wednesday.

Love,

3T